Advance praise for How Not To Do Things:

“If you, like me, respond to the sentence, ‘The loudest guitar player in the world brought a toilet over the next day,’ with, ‘Please do tell me more!’ then you are holding the absolute right book in your hands.”
– David Greenberger, author of The Duplex Planet

Hilarious, humane, as witty as she is wise and weird, Susan Blood is bloody brilliant!
Stephen Russell, voice actor and playwright

A funny, touching, enlarging collection.
Brenda Withers, playwright of Matt & Ben, The Ding Dongs, and String Around My Finger

Grab a bag of cheesypuffydoodles and a box of wine and enjoy every word.
Christine Rathbun Ernst, The Fat Ass Cancer Bitch

“an ‘I-totally-get-that!’ manual for every household”
Troy Smith, Author of Nirvana: The Chosen Rejects

(read more)

Stories include:

  • How not to crash your own funeral
  • How not to catch a mouse
  • How not to prepare for an emergency
  • How not to renovate your home
  • How not to try on a bathing suit
  • How not to take up a hobby
  • and oh so many more….

You’ll laugh. You’ll cry. You’ll be glad you’re not me.

(photo by Michael & Suz Karchmer)